Stained glass cross crown 3rexesblogspotcomSadly, the lady in this very short video has missed the boat with her son.  (Language alert — she turns the air blue!)  Incidentally, I’m not sure what the kitty is playing on the keyboard afterward, but there are a few ideas here in the comments. 

Does the argument appear to be a fake?  I wouldn’t think so.  I can imagine that a lot of parents have that same heated discussion with their teenagers.

Note that the mother mentions that the son was confirmed.  How much would you bet that after his Confirmation the family stopped going to Sunday service?  His high school friends probably said: ‘I can’t believe you still go to church!  Ha ha!  That’s too funny.  Man, get a life.’ So he no doubt said, ‘Mom, now that I’m confirmed, can we stop going to church now?’  And Mom probably said, ‘Okay.’  Now, she’s upset that the boy’s faith is shrivelling up and wants them to start attending church again ‘every Sunday’.  Sorry, madam, it just won’t happen. 

But, she’s not alone in this.  Look at Dad.  All the spiritual backbone of a marshmallow.  My take on it is that Mom’s frustrated with him as well as the son.  She’s overcompensating for his lack of response, hence the blue language.

Yeah, okay, it may be an ‘ungodly’ reaction, but it is understandable. 

A couple of Anglican priests have told me that children — especially boys — only go to church in adulthood if both parents accompany them.  If the mother goes alone, the kids stop going at 18 or when they leave home.  If Dad goes along, too, the child continues going as an adult, even after leaving home.  The priests could see this in their own congregations but also had studies to back this up.  

The topic of a child’s church ‘formation’ came up recently on the Haligweorc blog here.  Note how things have changed over the past 20 years:

We were planning for next year and we had some suggestions that education classes not be held every Sunday because, can we really expect people to get to church that much? And then to stay for a whole two hours (for mass and Christian Ed)?

[ol’ codger tone] When I was growing up  going to church every Sunday is what was both expected and done. We did it, the families on our street did it, the families at our church did it. The only times we weren’t in church was on campouts for Scouts. Otherwise if you weren’t there, people assumed you were sick/indisposed. M said it was the same way for them. And we’re not talking the ’50’s here, these were the ’80’s. [/ol’ codger tone]

Also back then, there were very few sporting events and such held on Sunday morning (I can think of a few soccer leagues in our area that had games then—but not many). One of the reasons is because they simply could not get the kids because parents wouldn’t let them skip church to play on Sundays.

Catholics can always go to Saturday evening vigil Mass.  Protestants can probably find a Sunday evening service to attend.  But for any lasting success, both parents must attend and with a sincere participation.  Going back to the family above, it won’t help if Dad goes and sits in the pew like a large jelly and Mom belts out all the prayers and the hymns.  Their son will see it as ‘sad’.  He will then see church as ‘sad’. 

This is why when you’re evaluating a serious relationship and considering marriage you should ask yourself about children.  How would you raise them in the love and spirit of the Lord?  Would the kids see both of you accompanying them to church?  Would you both take an active part in the service? 

So often, the ‘what-if’, ‘distant possibility’ scenarios occur sooner than we think.  If orienting our children towards future churchgoing is an imperative for us, we need to plan for that early on.  Certainly before we approach the altar in marriage.

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